Swiss Cheese and Promises

On Saturday, Peter and I went for a check up to see how I am responding to the Follistim. The ultrasound revealed little other than the fact that my cyst has more than doubled in size in just 2 days. The doctor said that as long as my estrogen levels remain where they are, there is no reason to worry about it...it will begin to go away on it's own. Otherwise, it was rather uneventful. The nurse told us that she would call with the results of my blood work, until then we just had to wait. Story of my life. Luckily they called pretty quickly and said the Follistim is working, slowly...but surely. They told me to up my dose to 75iu and to come back on Monday (today). So today I went in and my ultrasound showed that my cyst is shrinking, which is awesome! I also have two follicles beginning to grow in my right ovary. Sweeet! My blood work confirmed my progress and they want me to continue the 75iu injections tonight and tomorrow and come in for blood work and an ultrasound on Wednesday.

So far the injections haven't been too stressful, except for the first one. It took us the better part of an hour to complete the first because I was scared. haha Thank goodness I have a patient husband. He eventually just took the injector out of my hand and did it himself. Since then, we've gotten better at it. I have to switch sides each day so my bruises can heal a little on the off day. Between the crook of my arm and my stomach, I look like a piece of abused Swiss cheese. The shots feel like any other shot, but the liquid burns like mad for about half an hour after it goes in. But as I've said, it will all be worth it if it works.

I'm trying really, really hard not to be too hopeful, but this cycle is going pretty well...aahhhhh I just hate the let down every time. It's so painful to go 16 days wondering if it worked, looking for signs, analyzing every twinge. It's truly exhausting. I've spent the last six months trying to find a balanced emotion..where I can be positive, but with a level head and the understanding that so much of this is about the odds. It's like we are rolling a dice, hoping for a six. We just have to wait, eventually we'll hit. (At least that's what they tell me.) For now, we're living on hope and prayer..and faith that God already knows the amazing little person He will send to us when the time is right. No matter what that means.